the morning after the night before

My hangover was unbearable. It hurt to breathe in and it hurt to breathe out. Any noise might as well have been an explosion. Any thought I had caused that much discomfort I felt like I was going to vomit. My mouth was dryer than the ashtray I had just put my hand in when blindly reaching for anything to drink. It felt as though I would have had more joy trying to turn the Sahara desert into a marsh by spitting on it.

Although I am reflecting back on New Years Day I still remember that I could not have paid for the quality time I had with mONKEYs fOREHEAd over this holiday period. Exclusives like this come before any time off. Here I was living the morning after the night before with one of the greatest bands to come out. I was going to say out of the UK but feel to judge me if I say, the world.

I ambled across the sleeping bodies and made my way into the kitchen. The cool blast that spewed out of the refrigerator was a Godsend. I could have fallen back to sleep in there as the refreshing chilled air massaged my throbbing temples. I pulled a can of something from its ice-cold nest, opened up its face and drank the contents. As the gas hit my stomach it realised it would rather be outside my body rather than inside it and so made its way back out with a loud belch. Ordinarily a house waking belch but not today. Not only would waking a statue have been easier, today was going to be about not leaving the house. Today is about sitting watching whatever mind numbing new years TV is on offer whilst slowly drip-feeding left over food stuffs. Today is about using as few words as possible with no intention of showering. Today is New Year’s Day. All is quiet on New Year’s Day.